Concerned Mom

Big J here!

This is an easy question but at the same hand, it can be a bit difficult to answer. To help me answer the many different aspects and facets of your question, I’ll introduce to you one of my crack smokin’ staff, Tampa Railroad Hobo.

Hobo: Hi Concerned Mom!

Have you ever asked your teenager if he/she is on drugs? If your teenager answer yes, then why not use that moment to bond and explore why he/she likes to go out in la la land with puff the magic dragon. A concerned parent should also be an understanding parent.

What are the symptoms and signs? Bowls of Frost Flakes between the hours of noon to 3am, Crazy appetite for Papa John’s Pepporoni Pizza, Face Resembles like Pizza, Skid Marks, Watches ‘Half Baked’ more than 3 times a day and excessive online game play on World of Warcraft, just to name a few.

Garner trust and respect from your teenager. Then when the time comes, you steal his/her stash and flush that crap down the toliet!! Ass beating is optional. Make sure you’re not on the influence just in case law enforcement comes knocking on your door.

Long story short: Your husband is the supplier.

Sincerely, Big J and Hobo.

-Hopeless

Dear Hopeless,

There are many ways to tell if someone has a gambling problem. For example, if you are standing in the lobby of a building and someone bets you money that a certain elevator door will open first, that person probably has a gambling problem.

If a man has a drug problem but can’t afford to buy drugs because he lost all his money gambling, then he probably has a gambling problem.

If a woman bets money on the Tampa Bay Buccaneers or the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, then she probably has a serious gambling problem.

If you want to make a person stop gambling, get them addicted to something else. I suggest Christianity. Just have them give all the money they would normally gamble with to the church. The payoff will be far greater than it would be at the casino. I’ll bet you anything!

Thanks,

Jesus